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Satirical News
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Spying and Lying -- 5 Limericks
[9 Jan 2006 at 8:00am]
Political commentary and five limericks called "A Bush Pioneer Who's Named Jack," "George Bush Says His Spying Is Cool," "Consultation Dubya Style," "Did The White House On Christiane Spy?" and "Preacher Pat:"
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Fitzmas Madness
[23 Oct 2005 at 9:00am]
Commentary and a poem inspired by the Valerie Plame outing investigation and pre-indictment jitters.
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30 second pitch: Dopamine Rush
by Benjamin
[1 Dec 2011 at 6:39pm]
Dopamine Rush is a new web community that provides a dopamine rush to its users by pointlessly awarding points when someone clicks on your name.
Explanation:
Patent pending. By Hanjabanja.
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The latest additions to our investment portfolio
by Benjamin
[24 Nov 2011 at 1:45pm]
Badgeclout: the gamified reputation system that’s pay to play. To assign whuffie to a person, you have to buy it, in the form of virtual gifts like Rolodexes and heart-shaped boxes of chocolates. These gifts can then be traded or assigned like currency. Obviously, the whole thing sits on top of Twitter.
Frolickinbrine: “curse” your Facebook [...]
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No, I?m serious. Who the hell are you people and what do I do with you?
by Benjamin
[9 Nov 2011 at 5:46pm]
At Rum & Monkey, we love our audience. You’ve been here with us since the beginning; on January 30, 2002, when we pulled the giant “on” switch and the city lights all flickered out – we like to think with joy – you were ready and waiting for the products of our fecund finger-tappings.
The Internet, [...]
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An open letter from a do-gooder pretending to be Al Qaeda
by Benjamin
[7 Jul 2011 at 9:03am]
Hi, America! Al Qaeda here. We’d like to thank you for changing your way of life in response to our activities over the last ten years. It’s fun to visit an airport or public place and see that familiar Al Qaeda stamp! Thanks to our friends at the TSA for making this possible.
We’d like to [...]
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LolPalin
by Benjamin
[14 Jan 2011 at 4:35am]
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Rum and Monkey monetization strategies: draft notes
by Benjamin
[11 Nov 2010 at 6:11pm]
Editor’s note: Rum and Monkey has existed as a website since January 31, 2002, well before many of its visitors had mastered the art of fully autonomous toilet control. However, it is not yet the Internet giant it deserves to be. These are the notes from a recent meeting where plans to rectify this by [...]
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Childish Gambino
by Chochiphopera
[3 Jul 2010 at 11:13pm]
Poor blog, I still love you, you neglected piece of crap.
Childish Gambino, aka Donald Glover, released his album Culdesac today. You can download it for free! Have some summer fun with Donald Glover and his indie-rap stylings. He produced it himself so you know it’s good and he’s got the mad cred.
PS. Buy Drew’s (of [...]
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Evading bears: a primer
by Benjamin
[30 May 2010 at 7:25pm]
Bears. n.
Big hairy chunks of snarl. Big teeth, powerful body, all-consuming love of salmon.
Husky, large, manly gay men, with a lot of body hair.
Beverages consumed by the illiterate.
This article is about evading #1.
Why might I want to evade a bear?
Bears are large animals, with correspondingly large teeth and a propensity for snarling at bees. [...]
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Some iPad jokes
by Benjamin
[28 May 2010 at 4:06am]
What’s black and white and red all over?
A smug iPad owner, bludgeoned to death with his device, bleeding all over the tastefully-rendered better-than-desktop website glowing prominently on its shimmering, crystalline screen.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To escape the restrictive limitations of Apple FairPlay DRM.
A man walks into a bar.
He accidentally leaves his prototype phone [...]
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Numan and Ant: Two Great Tastes Which Taste Great Together?
by Chochiphopera
[14 Apr 2010 at 2:46pm]
Adam Ant has been doing some live shows lately (wearing mad makeup) and hanging out with Noel Fielding so it was simply a matter of time before he joined Gary Numan on stage and acted strange some more. Awww lookit this
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZZzxXUP64O0
This is always an acceptable look, yes.
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Recap - Week of 1/30/12
[3 Feb 2012 at 12:00am]
Newt Gingrich makes lunar predictions, Barack Obama holds a web chat, John Oliver sings about economic inequality, and Aasif Mandvi investigates welfare drug testing laws.
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Poor Pee-Ple
[2 Feb 2012 at 12:00am]
Aasif Mandvi heads to Florida to find out why Luis Lebron, a Navy veteran and public assistance recipient, won't submit to welfare drug testing.
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2/2/12 in :60 Seconds
[2 Feb 2012 at 12:00am]
John Hodgman offers poor people a business opportunity, Aasif Mandvi tries to get Florida Governor Rick Scott to pee in a cup, and David Agus considers America's health.
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